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I am a Los Angeles-based twentysomething. I have a profession, and I have a secret life in music, and this blog isn't about any of that. I like Blogger because I can't read what you're thinking.

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Tuesday, October 6   >>

COOL STORY BRO

There is something peculiar about Chase commercials in that the background music (Michelle Branch, Sting, Daughtry) is mixed in such an unusual fashion that it draws more attention to itself than it does the imagery. It's not as simple as highs getting higher or lows getting lower -- there is an absolute difference in their original CD mixes that it makes me wonder if there's some creepy subliminal shit going on that makes us trust Chase to be the bestest bank ever.

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Music for anti-depressant medication commercials are also interesting; they start in a minor key and always end on its relative major key (it's the visual equivalent of being super bummed and then Japanese game show-happy in a matter of a chord change). Now my fellow geeks might just call me Captain Obvious but take a closer listen and you'll find one instantly common sonic denominator.

The last note in medication commercial melodies is always, always, always on a major third. It is a highly manipulative musical device (probably the most manipulative, dare I say dangerous) and it pains me to know that it is likely manipulative enough for people with mild chemical imbalances to think they can find absolute happiness in said advertised medication.

That's kinda fucked up, isn't it?

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It's weird. A bunch of musician gigs have fallen in my lap and I've accepted them all when the right price came around.

I pretty much sold my soul to the devil to Spanish rock music (barf), but in this economy, you have to take advantage of big cash in little time.

The other stuff is WAY more fucking hip, but I signed off my dignity to a genre of music I absolutely loathe. Spanish rock is, like, Yoshinoya. It's eating their entire Teriyaki bowl when you know--for a fact--that it has virtually NOTHING to do with Japanese cuisine.

So, yes, it's official. I'm a sell out.

Had to happen eventually, I suppose.

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I know several musicians who went this route in full fucking speed. Some others do it moderately ("I ...like the band, but it's mostly for the kids, and they show up, so..."), and I guess that's okay.

But doing something without a real passion for it just because it provides boatloads of money doesn't seem appealing. To me, at least. Like, let's say Nickelback wanted me to play organs for them or something.

I'd, be, like, "Sure."

And then we'd all do some white boy dance or something and then I'd be all, like, "NUH-UH, JUST KIDDING. FUCK THAT SHIT."

And then Chad Kroeger would be, like, "Well, that's fine. I'm gonna write another song with the exact same changes and number of bars while I get blown by 7 high school grads on my wife's jet."

And then I'd be, like, "...hm."

But then I'd be, like, "Nah, I'm straight."

And then I'd go back to being an unemployed musician.

And then I'd go to sleep fine. And that's cool in my book.