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I am a Los Angeles-based twentysomething. I have a profession, and I have a secret life in music, and this blog isn't about any of that. I like Blogger because I can't read what you're thinking.

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Monday, April 5   >>

CHURCH

I went to church yesterday.

Strange, I know.

Surprisingly, I didn't go up in flames. In fact, it was pretty cold.

I went because The Girlfriend and her mother had invited my family to join them at their service. So we double-family-dated. Hot.

If you're like me, you probably have no affiliation to any church. And not because you think there is no God, but because you probably believe that institutionalized faith does more harm than good. But that's aside from the point.

If you're like me, you probably have friends and family who are closely affiliated to church. And, if you're like me, you're freakin' awesome and, often, you get asked to go to events and celebrations and ceremonies and all that other hooplah that goes on at church.

Isn't going the most awkward feeling?

It's, like, everyone around you does the crazy Jesus hand gestures, and everyone prays with their eyes closed and you're just standing there, wondering, uh, err, "...What do I do?" And you just stand, like a little placeholder.

It's always weird going to religious stuff as a person who doesn't necessarily believe in religion. I don't think that's blasphemous.

I mean, imagine you're Italian. And all you eat is Italian food. And all you know is a loud Italian lifestyle. And you're so Italian, that there's no time to pray at the table because you're fighting with your ma.

MA! MA! DON'T TOUCH MY FUCKIN' HAIR, MA!

And then, one day, your Chinese friend Ping Pong invites you to his house. You show up and it's all quiet 'n shit because Ping's little brothers are studying galactic calculus, and you have to take off your shoes because Ping's parents are too cheap to rent a carpet cleaner, and then you trip out because, for dinner, there's a deep-fried dog on the table. IT'S JUST NOT YOUR LIFESTYLE AND IT'S JUST GOING TO MAKE YOU A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE, RIGHT?

Right.

And that's why church is always weird to me.