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I am a Los Angeles-based twentysomething. I have a profession, and I have a secret life in music, and this blog isn't about any of that. I like Blogger because I can't read what you're thinking.

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Tuesday, August 2   >>

SPEAKING OF BUTTONS

...I have this western-y type of shirt that has buttons which aren't held through holes in the fabric. The buttons are the "snap!" ones that can come off just by pulling the shirt off, Hulk Hogan style. They are very convenient to unbutton -- far more convenient than the traditional push-through button.

I love taking off my western shirt, though. The other night, I wore it. I was dead tired, and I went to my bed in a tired stupor, and RIPPED the shirt off, without any damage thanks to those fine buttons. Imagine if they had been the traditional push-through-the-hole buttons; FUCK that would've been a bitch to take off!

BUT NO this shirt is AWESOME. RRRRRRIP. It's like a prop shirt made for rampant sex scenes. I love it.

That's it, every button-down shirt should have these buttons, but engineered in a manner to make them a facade to resemble traditional buttons. Anyone in the clothing business? Hit me up.

But, then I got to thinking again. Perhaps my button-down problem could be solved very easily.

I could just wear t-shirts. But I don't like t-shirts. I can't remember the last time I wore a t-shirt. I have nothing against them, I just think they're boring. I love long sleeve, button down shirts that make me look like a complete prick. They're rather nice.

Buttons are a bitch, man. Scrap that idea I pitched about the newly engineered buttons.

VELCRO. THERE'S A SOLUTION.

But imagine how hard it would be to align the velcro on-the-run. God, there's another freaking problem.

You know what? Everyone should just be naked, the way nature intended it to be. When the hell did humans feel the need to cover themselves up? Stupid idea. Mother Nature should've just told apes to adapt to weather, and not invent something that would soon become a catalyst to society's creation of the Fug.

Speaking of thinking, you know what really pisses me off?

You know how when you have a hard time sleeping, you think so much that you just get tired and drift off? But JUST as you're going to drift off, you think of something ABSOLUTELY IMPORTANT THAT IT MAKES YOU WAKE UP AT SQUARE ONE? For shit's sake, that is THE most annoying thing in the world.

Sleep, buttons, and clothing -- what an inconvenience.