Thursday, September 29   >>

JODIE FOSTER DOESN'T CARE ABOUT FLIGHT PEOPLE

Check this shit out.

"Labor unions representing most of the nation's 90,000 flight attendants have urged their members to boycott a new Jodie Foster film that portrays a flight attendant and a U.S. air marshal as terrorists."

It's. A. Freaking. Movie.

Anyway, has anyone seen this movie? I haven't, but I want to. If you don't know what Flightplan is about, it's about a woman who takes a flight with her daughter.

Oh yeah, and then she loses the child, and, err, the airline claims they have no record of her daughter EVEN BEING THERE. A bunch of suspense ensues and it's supposed to be as thrilling as a cock fight.

...RESPONSIBLE!

I'm sure it has to do something with, like, crazy employees who have a personal vendetta on Jodie Foster for being in that waste of time we all know as Contact. But I kid Jodie Foster.

You know what would be really funny?

If, at the end of the movie, it turns out the daughter was having a case of the runs in the bathroom.

"Mommy!"

"Oh, daughter! Where have you been!?"

"I've been in the can. Number two."

Then the suspected flight attendant goes, "SEE? NOOOOOBODY LOOKED THERE. AND IIIII SAID, 'CHECK THE RESTROOM, CHECK THE RESTROOM.' BUT NOOOO, EVERYONE'S ALL, 'OOH, LOOK AT FLIGHT ATTENDANT SUSIE, SHE'S A CRAAAAZY ONE, SHE PROBABLY ATE THE KID. OOH, LOOK AT FLIGHT ATTENDANT SUSIE, SHE ATE A CHILD.' BUT NOOOOO, I WAS, ALL, LIKE, 'LOOK IN THE RESTROOM,' AND BOOM THERE SHE IS AND YOU ALL DOUBTED ME AND THOUGHT I WAS SOME PSYCHOTIC KID-EATER WH--"

And then the airplane blows up. And then the airline declares bankruptcy.

...But I kid Tom DeLay's career (don't even get me started on Bill Frist's little bad-boy-plan-gone-awry -- LOL)!!!