Wednesday, May 20   >>

THIS IS GETTING BAD

When I'm with a group of people and someone pops out a digital camera, I run. Maybe not literally, but I'm so not there anymore. It's like your parents telling you you're going to Disneyland, and then they end up driving you to the doctor to get your asthma shots. It's, like, "Oh. Is that why we're here?"

I always wonder why someone would want to take a picture with just me. I am not famous. I'll never be famous. I'm also pretty horrific looking, despite how sexy I've convinced you all that I am. And, on top of everything, I am wayyyyyyy low on the social totem pole.

My real friends would never ask to be in a picture with them.

It's not even a self-esteem thing. I'd just like to think that there are some things and moments that are sacred, and should be preserved without the limitations of DPI.

Are you really going to share that picture? Ugh, flash does horrible things to your skin. And, oh my goodness, the red eye. The red eye! I always look like the Terminator when someone takes a picture. And not the widely-considered-sexy-by-females naked Terminator. I'm talking about the bare-metal robot with the red eye.

Even Google's CEO urged graduates to unplug. That's the CEO of the world's greatest technological power.

I really miss the times when people thought that all of this:

...didn't mean anything.

Secret: Still doesn't.