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I am a Los Angeles-based twentysomething. I have a profession, and I have a secret life in music, and this blog isn't about any of that. I like Blogger because I can't read what you're thinking.

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Thursday, July 30   >>


You are SO compassionate!

And you're right: If CNN isn't on it, clearly, it isn't relevant anymore.


President Obama is going to have a "beer summit" tonight. I want to know why I wasn't invited. I mean, shit, I like the president. And I DEFINITELY like beer. We would have pounded a 6-pack over stories about the campaign trail that I KNOW he misses.

"Remember Iowa? And how everyone was, like, 'IT'S OVAH! IT'S OVAH! GAME OVAH!' Man, they were really right, and, at the same time, so stupid!"

"Hugo," the president would say, "Wanna be the Secretary of AWESOME?"



I swear, if my friends and I go bowling, we're bowling next to, like, international bowling champions. If my friends and I go play tennis, we're always playing next to Pete fucking Sampras or whatever. THROW ME A FUCKING BONE, GOD.


If you say, "I want to watch 'Paper Heart,' " I want you to not talk. Like, ever.


"The Goods": Ari Gold, but not rich.