LICK THE DEVIL'S TAINT: A MANIFESTO TO ANYONE WHO HAS EVER WRONGED ME
That's going to be the title of my book.
It's going to be at least 450 pages long.
And it will be a RomCom. And, at the end, Mandy Moore will die.
"Mandy," whimpered David, under a hush sigh of both regret and loss, "Don't leave me. You can't leave me."
Mandy turned around on her hospital bed, finally meeting eyes with David for the first time in 2 weeks since her accident at the S&M convention.
"You don't know this, but I've been fucking your dad for the past nine--"
The unapologetic beep stopped beeping. It was just one singular, long note. It was a whole note tied to another whole note in a 2-bar phrase with a repeat sign. It was like that and stuff.
She was dead.