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I am a Los Angeles-based twentysomething. I have a profession, and I have a secret life in music, and this blog isn't about any of that. I like Blogger because I can't read what you're thinking.

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Wednesday, May 26   >>


But first, more on handshakes.

Good discussion on handshakes, guythh. One reader wrote in saying I missed the ultimate handshake advantage. I'm so stupid for having missed this key component to handshaking that I should be stripped of being your resident handshake analyst.

The Hand-Dome of Power.

This is when you shake someone's hand whose grip is equally as strong as yours, and in order to establish dominance, you put your OTHER hand over the entire handshake, creating a proverbial Hand-Dome of Power.

It says, "No. I rule this handshake. I do."

But, reader, you forgot the advantage over the Hand-Dome of Power!

The advantage to the Hand-Dome of Power is the Upper-Arm Grip of Power. Ho-ha, reader. CHECKMATE!

This is when you shake someone's hand and they're equally handshake-savvy as you are and beat you to the punch to the Hand-Dome of Power.

How do you beat that? You grip the other person's upper arm. This is the Upper-Arm Grip of Power.

If you've done this, you've won. You're the ultimate master of handshakes.

I am a VERY big fan of the Upper-Arm Grip of Power, but I rarely ever use it since people rarely ever give a shit about handshake dominance as much as I do.

President Obama is the best handshaker ever (trust me, I've been watching him since 2004). He has mastered the art of the Upper-Arm Grip of Power and made more friendlier but equally compelling variations on it. Just check it out:

See? Brilliance. Presifuckingdential brilliance.

So that's how you master a handshake.

Oh, and if you want to lose a guy in 10 days, just be a woman and form an opinion.

Tomorrow on the blog: "Lost," "24," and Jaleel White